Answer by ShakyKnees

Thanks for the link. I gotta stop filtering my MSFT searches to SQL2008R2 when I come up empty. BTW, the canned "TSQL_Replay" template (in 2008 R2 at least) is missing the TextData column for Stored ProcRPC events, which made them unplayable (the "could be replayed" category you mentioned), eliminating 98% of my traffic. I've saved my own edited version of that template with TextData added for Stored Procedures: "RPC:Starting" and "RPC:Completed", and it made traces usable.